Success

/Tag:Success
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  • You're not selfish

Do you ever feel guilty of being selfish?

August 11th, 2016|Categories: Blog, Communication & conflict, Exhaustion, Overwhelm|Tags: , , , |

Do you ever feel guilty of being selfish?  “How do you know the difference between being selfish and just good self-care?” This is a question that Michael Yapko PhD, in his recent book, poses as one of the top 12 discernment struggles. Too often people give up on good self-care because they wrongly judge something as being ‘selfish’. I put my hand up for being guilty of this countless times, putting everyone else’s needs before my own and neglecting to [...]

  • Be_helpful_not_enabling

Are you really helping or enabling? Something every helpful person needs to know…

July 27th, 2016|Categories: Blog, Communication & conflict, Exhaustion, Overwhelm|Tags: , , , |

When you see someone struggling, do you feel impelled to make it better and fix it, to stop the discomfort? This can look like; doing your child’s homework for them, fighting your friend’s battles on their behalf, taking on another person’s workload to stop them from getting in trouble at work, etc. If this sounds like you or someone else you know, it’s important you know this… Helping someone to avoid the consequences of their actions is enabling… Enabling teaches [...]

Keeping your cool takes…

July 14th, 2016|Categories: Blog, Communication & conflict, Overwhelm|Tags: , , , |

It can be hard to keep your cool with other people, children, bosses, work colleagues and the like. They may at times seem thoughtless, inconsiderate, rude and even deliberately hostile. Yet, I’m guessing you may have experienced losing your cool in moments and then felt that you didn’t put your best foot forward or represent yourself as effectively as you would have liked. It’s more useful to remain calm in situations and allow your mind to think strategically. Having a [...]

How to make a friend of the voice inside your head…

July 7th, 2016|Categories: Blog, Communication & conflict, Overwhelm|Tags: , , , |

By popular request for help on self-talk, here are some strategies. We all know the critical inner voice inside our head. It’s the one who can pick every nitty gritty fault out, even the ones that others don’t see. It will focus on the one thing you could have done better rather than the bucket load of things that you’re doing well in any day. When things get really bad and this voice takes over your thinking it can have [...]

  • Holding_the_Space

How to ‘hold your space’ in the face of adversity

June 30th, 2016|Categories: Blog, Overwhelm|Tags: , , |

We’ve had people ask us, “How do you stay confident in the face of other people’s criticisms and judgements?”  Confronted with an onslaught of negative opinion or being around negatively focused people can easily impact your feelings of self-worth. You can end up doubting your own judgement and wondering if you really are… (what everyone says you are). How do you find your way in a world which is inclined this way? You need buffers. Buffer zones protect your worth [...]

Lacking confidence some days? 3 quick tips to gain more…

June 23rd, 2016|Categories: Blog, Overwhelm|Tags: , , |

Maybe you’ve experienced some of these feelings: a lack of confidence in your ability, feeling that you have to keep people happy and the frustration, oh the frustration that no matter how much you do, it doesn’t feel like enough? These feelings are in plague proportions for a good majority, so take comfort in knowing you’re not the only one. Here are three things I’ve learned that may help you gain a foothold on confidence and self-worth. 1. Be willing to [...]

  • balancing_adversity

How to thrive, even in adversity

May 25th, 2016|Categories: Blog|Tags: , , , , , , , |

Mel Gibson is quoted as saying, “I’ve learned that a bitter experience can make you better.” No doubt you have proved this too. It CAN make you better but it requires having adequate support, coping mechanisms and resources. A recent study reported on the critical role that mothers play in helping children thrive or flourish in adversity.* Adverse Childhood Experiences** (ACEs), situations like a family breakup, the death of a parent, living with someone who is depressed for more than [...]

  • family_on_hands

Family culture: it’s in your hands

May 12th, 2016|Categories: Blog|Tags: , , , , , , |

Family... You can't live without them and, sometimes, it's jolly hard to live with them! Whatever the nature of our family and relationships, regularly taking a moment to reflect on what family means to us and the type of family culture we want to belong to, is really useful. If there's a prevailing mood of cooperation and respect within your crew, that's great! If you feel there's room for improvement, that's great too because now is the perfect time to [...]

  • telephone_conversation

Difficult Conversations Made Easy…Easier

April 14th, 2016|Categories: Blog|Tags: , , , , , , |

You’ve probably discovered, like I have, that some conversations are hard to have. As a result they can be put off; sometimes forever. Usually, it’s the fear of hurting someone’s feelings or of feeling hurt by what they might say that stops us from taking action, but in the end that doesn’t yield the best result for anyone. When situations are left unresolved, angst builds and relationships suffer. Feeling confident to discuss things as they arise helps avoid misunderstandings and [...]

  • Loving_relationships_one_question

One question that could help a relationship last a lifetime…

March 21st, 2016|Categories: Blog|Tags: , , , , |

Easter is almost upon us and hopefully this means some R&R for you. With that in mind and contemplating what type of Easter would be worth having this year, I remembered a conversation with a student last week and wanted to share. My student is a gentleman in his early 70’s who has just retired, survived life-threatening illness and has commenced study for a new career in counselling. We were chatting and he shared he’d been married for 45 years, [...]

  • Virtues_vs_wins

Who will you impress and how?

March 7th, 2016|Categories: Blog|Tags: , , , |

Following on from my last blog, my friend passed away last week and his funeral was on Saturday. Repeatedly people kept remembering how he had made them feel - accepted, loved and included. He lived a life of virtue and valued everyone that came into it and we were all warmed by it. How do you like to impress people? By wins or virtues… When I was in my early twenties I thought life was about getting rungs on the [...]